Kate Walker – 121 EFL session – May 2019


I chose to come because I felt lost and scared after having lost my soulmate mare. The grief was overwhelming me, and I didn’t know where to start in putting myself back together. Having searched the internet and found your website I just thought you’d ‘get’ that, and I would be able to share and offload the rawness I was feeling.

I found the session extremely enlightening, in particular how it pulled up so many emotions attached to my mother and made me realise how much of what I feel is bound up in how much I love her and miss her and how, even when a person doesn’t choose to ‘leave’ you, that sense of abandonment is still a massive hurdle to overcome.

The loss of my beautiful mare Molly brought the feeling back and magnified it many times over. Molly was and will always be indelibly linked to my mum. Although always an independent sort of person – or so I thought – I realise now how dependent I was on them both. The matter of my being a ‘latchkey’ child and the fears attached to that obviously sowed those seeds at an early age.

In my relationships with men I have either pursued those that I knew ultimately couldn’t succeed or if they showed promise then I ended them. I’m thinking this is all part and parcel of the same ‘issue’ but I don’t yet quite understand how! Am I a commitment-phobe? Abandon them before they abandon me perhaps?

I still can’t grasp why I was nervous approaching Jack in the field. I’ve never felt nervous approaching a horse in my life! And then he was so generous and genuine in the way he responded to me. Bramble was oddly much easier to understand and I hope I showed her the respect and understanding that she asked for.

I have been referring to the emotional message chart and also to the body scan videos which are a tremendous help in achieving a sense of grounding.

I have also decided I would like to do your Connect Workshop so that I continue this work but it won’t be until next year as I have allocated all my annual leave (and my finances!) for the remainder of this year.
It was a real treat to meet you and I have just clicked on ‘like’ for your Facebook age so that I can follow you. I have also answered the questions in your email below.

Something I wanted to share with you that was highly emotional but also a healing experience for me whilst I was away in Wales. I took myself on a three hour walk along the beach with the dog which took in the place where I scattered my mum’s ashes in 2013. It also happened to be three months to the day since I’d lost Molly. It was an amazing day, blue skies, barely a breeze which is unusual. The dog headed for the remains of a wooden boardwalk so that he could flop down in the shade for a while, coincidentally almost the exact spot where mum was laid to rest along with the ashes of three family dogs. I sat for a long while and remembered her and them, and my dad and I felt a bitter sweetness and most importantly – deep gratitude. I gathered some pebbles white ones for my parents and grey ones for the dogs to bring home and place in my garden. As I got up to leave, I noticed a beautiful little pink and cream shell like a unicorn horn lying in the sand. Usually these are incomplete, bits broken off but this one was perfect. Obviously, I picked it up and popped it in my bag. That evening I was sitting out on the terrace whilst my friends were preparing dinner and I looked up and saw a horse in the clouds. Not just any horse, I knew it was Molly and a sign from her. I couldn’t get my breath, it was astonishing even down to her eye, galloping legs stretched out and tail streaming behind her … and a unicorn horn.

I have noticed the feeling of heaviness has receded. I feel excited about continuing the work. I am working with a trainer whose methods go hand in hand with your own and he is helping me to develop both myself and my relationship with Burberry. It’s wonderful to see how things are dawning on Burberry, that he can relax and just be a horse after what has been quite a stressful life for him. This in turn is having a calming and enlightening effect on me too. I don’t think I would have begun this process had the heartbreak not been so profound and had I not started reaching out and found you and been guided to Linda’s books.

Rosie can help you in ways you didn’t even know you needed! She is that authentic person that we should all strive to be.

I’m happy to share anything that I’ve told you including my experience in Wales. I think retelling these occurrences can help others who are perhaps hoping for signs and for the comfort they offer.


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